Chiara Väth, 26. November 2022
Chiara Väth, 26. November 2022
I would like to take you on my own journey here, because before I started coaching, I was allowed to dive deep into my issues, heal and find myself. Everything I experienced on this path is the foundation of my work today. But it is very important for me to say at this point: This journey never ends! We are in growth processes our whole lives and that is beautiful because it gives us the opportunity to evolve more and more, to become more conscious, to shed old layers and to come into our full size. The life that I have created for myself today and that I love from the bottom of my heart is the result of this evolution. I am very lucky to live with my dream partner on the beautiful island of Mallorca, to follow my vocation and to be able to truly say that I am fulfilled by my life.
A few years ago it looked very different. I used to be very hard, rational, strict with myself, intolerant and performance-driven. I didn’t believe anything I couldn’t “see and touch”, considered emotions a weakness and thought I would be happy by perfecting myself as much as possible. This later developed into an eating disorder and the desire to optimise my body, which dominated my life for several years. For years, I successfully suppressed my feelings, based my worth on my performance and thought that success, popularity, money and materialism were the indicators of a fulfilled life.
However, a part of me knew even then that something could not be right. Because behind all these facades and masks I had built up for myself, there was always a deep sense of unhappiness. I felt as if a “veil of melancholy” was constantly hanging over my life. I was constantly stressed, had fears of failure and felt a constant emptiness inside me. Behind the desire for perfection lay strong self-doubt, self-rejection and the search for love and recognition. The “highlights” of my life, my “purpose”, were regular binge drinking, binge eating, cigarettes and dating. Later I recognised all this as compensation patterns and also the deep wounds that were still crying out to be healed.
Alcohol helped me to finally let go, because I could never do that in my life otherwise. The binge eating was the uncontrolled counterpart to the restrictive eating behaviour with which I tried to gain control over my life. The cigarettes were supposed to regulate my nervous system, which was constantly running high due to the stress level. The men were supposed to give me the love I couldn’t give myself. The dominant personality I built up on the outside was a shield for the insecurity I felt on the inside. There were many unprocessed emotions raging inside me, but I never allowed myself to show weakness. I had many friends – and mostly felt lonely. I had supposedly happy relationships, but was always trapped in emotional dependencies. It all felt wrong, but I couldn’t understand why at all at that time. I was constantly doing and running in my life, only to realise later that I was running away from myself all the time.
Then about 7 years ago I discovered personal development; the starting shot of my inner journey. That changed my life. I attended seminars, but quickly realised that the whole thing was often too superficial for me and didn’t really go into depth. I also noticed that people – including myself – often left the seminars highly motivated, only to fall back into old patterns a few days later. That stuck with me. Nevertheless, this was the entry into my passion and my own healing process. I began to deal with issues of personal development and psychology, seemingly 24/7. In the process of “deep immersion” I then also found spirituality. I began to deal with quantum physics, consciousness and brain research and immersed myself in the world of the “non-physical”. I meditated a lot, experimented with states of consciousness and got in touch with my interworld and all its parts. I used everything I learned to get to know myself. It was an exciting journey to the core of my being.
At the same time I went through various trainings with the great wish to open this new field of consciousness to other people. I completed training in the field of practical psychology, as a psychological counsellor, personal coach, psychological health counsellor, NLP coach and pain therapist. I learned remote viewing, card reading and how to use the I Ching.
With the launch of Corona, I quit my job at the time, ended my long-term relationship and moved out of the flat we shared without a new “place to stay”. I couchsurfed for a while and then set off alone on the Camino de Santiago. I went into complete primal trust and surrender, following my intuition and letting go of my old life to receive my new. During this time pure magic happened in my life and I developed a deep trust in the spiritual path I am on today.
It was also during this year that I began to support and coach women with an eating disorder on their journey in 1:1 accompaniment. I fell in love with 1:1 accompaniment because I could see how much could be moved through close and trusting collaboration. Even an eating disorder is only an expression of deeper issues and so my work has always been about one thing: accompanying people to their true BEING.
I love spiritual depth as much as I love dancing my feet off until 5 in the morning. I have incense on almost every day and celebrate spending an evening on the couch with pizza just as much. I love grounding myself in nature as much as watching a really good Netflix series. I go through deep pain as much as high altitudes.
We live in a polar world; it’s all part of it. But one thing I can say with 100% certainty: I am ALIVE today, with all emotions, connected to myself, knowing the direction of my journey, at the same time being guided by my intuition and inspired by life. I love my life as I have created it. And if that should change, I know that I am a creator and can always create something new for myself.